Disconnected

Sometimes, I feel lonely even around people. It's not the kind you cry about, but it's rather depressing. You go out, hang out with people and it's fun, but it feels entirely too abstract... like a dream. Is it real? Why do I feel so numb? And then you go back to your daily, solitary life and realize that again, you're experiencing that same disconnected loneliness. What's missing?

You're supposed to be happy by yourself. At peace in solitude, content without others' blessings. Sure, we're social creatures. Is what they all say wrong, then? Do you need other people to be happy? Do you need to depend on others, and this whole "being happy by yourself" thing is a load of crap?

Maybe it's pride. Pride that's keeping you from fullness. Because you need other people, and you need those people who help you feel whole, but you're just too stubborn and prideful to say sorry.

I feel like Akito the lone wolf.