Perfume

If I can smell you in front of me, in back of me, or around me and you're not directly next to me, you're wearing too much. If I can smell you when you're next to me, you're wearing too much. If I can smell you when you're a foot away from me, you're wearing too much. If I can smell you only when you're six inches or less away, you're getting sexier. Or if I'm burying my face into your shoulder and I get a faint whiff. That's sexy. If I'm barely touching you and I feel like I gotta smell coffee, don't you think that's a bit much? Scrunch up my nose and rub rub rub.

Rule of society: Don't overpower the rest of us with your perfume. You might wanna smell nice and like whatever sweet saccharine or musky body spray you love so much, but the rest of us don't. The rest of us like fresh air.